Thursday, August 11, 2011

"Your Worst Nappy Catastrophe"

We have hit 1500 fans!

To celebrate, I am hosting a story-based competition.

I figure I must not be the only mummy who has some dreaded "Nappy Catastrophe" stories. So in order to go in the running to win a FREE OOAK CUSTOM BARE RUMPS NAPPY (up to the value of $70.00 postage, covered by your self ) I'd like you to share your "Memoirs of Nappy Faux-Pas" - your "diaper dramas", "comedies of the Ca-Ca", your "parables of POO!" In other words - your "Worst Nappy Disaster" story.

Here is how it will work:

1) Simply write below your story of your child's worst "poo crime" that has unfolded in your household. We as cloth-mummies are bound to have a story or two that comes to mind! Make it as light-hearted and humorous as possible (omit any expletives - "wee" and "poo" are fine!) Please only leave one story comment per person.

2) Ensure you are an active liker of our Facebook page and include your REAL name as it is displayed on Facebook (no aliases please - your account must be a real account, not one just used for nappy purposes) at the end of your story so I can contact you if you are in the running.

3) I will then "" the names of TEN "contestants" who will be given the opportunity to participate in a fun little hunt via my website to determine who out of those ten will win the nappy. I will provide further details on the hunt at a later date, so for now just get your funny stories in .

Note that the comment posts are moderated, so please not not fret if nothing comes up straight away as I will moderate them which will allow them to be posted.

If your post does not come up  within 48 hours, then follow this link to my face book page under the note section , simply write your entry there - however please only do so after 48 hours to allow time for posts on the blog to be moderated. In order to post your comment you need to select an option from the drop-down box to "sign" your comment. Choose an appropriate option and then proceed to complete the word verification to allow the comment to post. If you do not have any of the accounts that come up under the options listed, choose the option "Name/URL" and enter your full name in that.

Only "stories" count towards the tally, and if you comment here please do not duplicate comments on the note section of the Facebook page. All entries will be double-checked to ensure everyone only has their comment counted once. I will them count from first post to last post , going from my blog to the Facebook notes section down .

Entries close at 5:00pm AEST on the 1st of September, 2011

Soooo... Here is my story!

"My sweet, adorable part-angel/part red wing-bearing friend of a daughter called Paige Red, has had some whopper nappy-catastrophes!
First of all when she was a baby I think she fancied her self being a future fire woman in training , and her bottom being a fire hose, some how I was not on fire though .... more so covered in POO after her bottom 'extinguishing' me parallel through the air reaching half a metre onto my freshly washed white dressing gown!

Now that she's a bit older, well.... My daughter fancies her self as Salvador Dali... 

                                                                      Notice a resemblance ? 

She quite often slinks off and does her business discretely, then proceeds to smear freshly scented "bottom-paint" all over every place she can get to: walls, windows, anything with a flat surface to act as a canvas for my budding artist child. At late her medium of preference is the FLAT SCREEN TV.....! Of course normally I am already cleaning like a mad woman (slave to the mop & broom comes with the job of being a mother to a two year old) while the crime is unfolding unbeknownst to me... However come to think of it, this could be some karmic revenge - some of my earliest memories were of doing the same RAOU ("Random acts of UN-kindness") to my very own mother. Eeeek! Pay-back!!"

Looking forward to reading your stories, and being apart of the unfolding fun over the next 4 weeks! 

- Jerry Red x 


  1. My worst nappy moment ever would have to be when we were away on a trip. We had just parked at a major shopping centre and for once my husband grabbed our son out of his seat for me. There were no trollies about so he carried him inside to look for one.

    Once inside he suddenly noticed something on his arm. It was POO! Closer inspection of bub and we found poo EVERYWHERE! All over hubs and bubs!! lol.

    SO i grab him and bolt for the nearest parents room but i can't see one!! so i duck into the ladies before anyone notices the poo thats all over my child and close the door.

    Now what?! All i have to work with is the loo seat lid. So i balance my oversized child on the seat, get the nappy off and then..... he slides and falls OFF the toilet feet first!! He gets WEDGED between the loo rim and the sanitry bin thats beside the toilet and of course lets out a scream....
    I quickly scoup him up and now i have him crying on the floor infront of the loo, i'm on my knees and my feet are sticking out from under the door but i finally get him changed. I'm sooooo embarrassed by what the people out there must think that i stay in the stall waiting so that most of the people would have hopefully done there business and left and then i can slink away lol.
    I make it back to hubs, both of us red faced from our ordeal. We all back trace our steps to where we came in so as to go in the direction we intended to to the shops and guess what i see?? The flippin' parents room!

    Oh yeah nappies can be a challenge! Good thing they're pretty :)

    Amanda Thompson on FB

  2. We don't have any major major stories but the ones ive read are hilarious! We have had the poo explosions. Glittery ones, yellow ones, sultana ones, corn ones, curry ones, pizza ones, blue paint ones, tinsel ones (they were gross having to pull strings of tinsel out!) YAY for cloth nappies!

  3. My husband and I when our daughter was two week old switched her to formula for a couple of feeding's a day. She was a little bit constipated due to the switch and so hadn't gone for a few days. My doctor told me to not to worry and she would sort herself out. My husband went back to work on the early October, so this was going to be one of my first days home with a newborn ever and I was pretty nervous. I took bubs into the bedroom for a routine feeding and a bum change. She was only wet so I laid her down on our bed (with no change pad underneath her) and got out a clean nappy. I took the wet one off and wiped her down and turned around to get the new nappy off the dresser. I put the new nappy on just as she started to "clean" herself out. I let her finish and turned and got another nappy. In the time it took me to do that she had projectile pooped. EVERYWHERE. My bed was covered, due to not putting a mat underneath her, my hair had poop in it, my socks, my legs, my shirt, down my shirt, the dresser behind me, the baby was covered in poop...and did I mention I still have a dark brown poop stain in my white carpet that I still cannot get out 10months later? I had no idea what to do. My husband had just left for work, I am covered in poop, and she's covered in poop. So I did what any good person does...cut the onesie off the baby to avoid her getting any more poop on her (it was already on her legs, arms, and hair so I don't know why I bothered) and I got in the bath. Fully dressed.
    The joys of poop. And to top things off. She power puked shortly after we got out of the bath...why not top things off right?

  4. My Youngest Man is fully breast feed and was pooing 3-4 even 5 times and day now does it every4-5 days and he gobbles every little bit. I remember his bottom doing lots of fluffs and then my hand being wet i was literally catching the poo in my hands and it smelt like really bad eggs. Then yesterday all of a sudden he was happy and there he was sitting in poo on the couch He is only 15 weeks old tomorrow!.
    Oh and my other son who just turned 2 and gastro. wow that was amazing checking on him in bed about a hour after putting him to bed to find poo everywhere his nappy was full and it was everywhere. Got him cleaned up and then he started vomiting everywhere lucky we caught most of it in the shower easy clean. give me a normal bowel movement anyday!

    Katrina O'Leary

  5. Mine would be at the reception of my best friends wedding. Mr L was only 4 months old at the time. Fully BF so bright yellow poo & hadn't gone for a week prior. I was Bridesmaid of Honour. Now theres no shame in saying my bestie went all out for her wedding. The best of everything! Including the bridesmaid dresses she chose out. They were a stunning Emerald shade & cost each bridesmaid $500ish. At the start of the night Liam wanted a feed so we sat down to get to business. He wasn't wriggling or grunting or showing any characteristics of pooping & we finished up our feed & headed back to reception. Just as i walked through the door, 1000 eyes of all the guests on us, i notice a felt wet.. So i looked down & poo was everywhere. Mr L was covered from head to toe & my $500 dress was looking a nice patchy shade of yellow! I may as well of not chucked a nappy on him at all as i reckon it barely caught any of that explosion!
    By now the kids of the reception are sniggering, the women are looking sorry & seem to be reminscing their own tragic poo story of when their grown up children were bubs & the men are looking green faced & poorly. Raced to the loo for a clean up. Mum chucked Mr L in the basin for a top to tail clean up & for the most part we were dignified again. I pick Mr L up to walk back out once again & just as we went threw the doors, 1000 eyes on us.. He powerchucks down my back! :P Good times, Good times! The Bride & my dearest friend in the whole wide world jokingly refused to let me sit at the head table until i was sprayed down with perfume. But we all know nothing covers the smell of churned milk vomit so she was forced to go the entire night next to a perfume,poo & spew smelling lady. & everyone wonders why they haven't had children of thier own yet hehe
    Naomi Fair

  6. There was a new mum,
    There was a new bum,
    A shopping trip for two,
    Oh how much fun.

    Baby is cute,
    She gets lots of smiles,
    Every one coos,
    As they go down the aisles.

    And then something changes
    Mum smells a smell,
    She takes a quick peak,
    Things are not well.

    In her cloth nap,
    As bubs starts to squirm,
    Is the poo of all poos,
    Things are beginning to turn.

    Mum starts to hurry,
    She grabs all the things,
    A race against time,
    Baby beginning to sing.

    As they race to the register,
    And stand in the line,
    Mummy soon realises,
    All is not fine.

    There it is,
    All brown and fresh,
    Something hanging,
    What a disgusting mess.

    As her eyes open wider,
    Bubs wriggles some more,
    Then a little bit more,
    Drops onto the floor.

    She watches in horror,
    What can she do,
    The floor and miss cutesy
    All covered in poo.

    A quick look around,
    Has anyone observed,
    That her child and the floor,
    Are covered in turd.

    A tissue is grabbed,
    She does a quick wipe,
    Groceries all through,
    Card goes swipe.

    She puts on a smile,
    Pretends all is well,
    Then races outside,
    Taking with her the smell.

    Baby wiped down,
    And into the car,
    Little naked bottom,
    They don’t have to go far.

    The moral of the story,
    There has to be one,
    Never trust that smell,
    To stay in a clothed bum.

    Rebecca :)

  7. alychia waters

    we wore on the way to vist my mum by the time i got their i new my son had done a poo by the smell he left in the car. i went around to get him out of the car and as i got him out i felt this warm thing in my fingers and on my hands on closer inspection i found he not only poo in his nappy but decide to decorate the cars seat with poo also. i yelled out to mum get the laundry tub ready jack has poo all the way up his back and no amount of wipes will help. as mum cleaned jack i did the cars seat. that was not the only time he decide to decorate the car seat.
    alychia waters

  8. My ‘poo’incident that comes to mind was with my oldest daughter.
    She had just turned 1 and was learning how to take her Velcro naps off.
    I’d put her down in her cot and not thought anything of it when she woke and I could hear her talking to herself.
    I left her for a few minutes and then went in to pick her up. I opened the door to her room and this terrible smell hit me. Here she was sitting in the middle of her cot happy as can be. She had no nappy on and her singlet was now a horrid brown colour. She had poo all over the mattress, sheets, every part of the cot and the walls she could reach, her dummy and was licking her poo covered fingers!!!
    This poor mum did lots of dry retching before picking her up and putting her in the bathtub fully clothed. The whole time my little cherub laughed and smiled and thought it was the funniest thing that had happened that day!!!
    So far I have been pretty lucky with my 7 month old and catching ‘poo and wee’. But gives us time and I’m sure I’ll have plenty more stories to share!
    Mandy Smith

  9. We had a catastrophe of the poo kind just the other day :(
    It was 7.30am and we were running late. Hubby had an important day and the kids and I had to quickly drive him to the train station. Anyway, we left our 1 year in his cot until we were ready to go, as he's a bit of a handful so we just planned to grab him out when we were ready to hop in the car.
    So hubby went into his room with no second to spare and our 'sweet' little man had somehow unzipped his jumpsuit, taken off his nappy, emptied his nappy all through his cot, painted his wall behind his cot (Newly painted walls), dropped bits of poo on his carpet (New Carpet),squished poo into the mesh side of his cot AND worst of all..he had poo all around his lips and face!!!!
    Needless to say, daddy was verrry late for work that day and mummy almost cried!
    Laila Jenkins

  10. My little man had been gobbling up prunes all day! It was the only thing he wanted to eat! So I'm in the kitchen making dinner and the little man is sitting in his high chair finger painting. Suddenly I notice that he has managed to mix a very brown colour onto his paper . . . uhoh!
    The prunes had done there job - we had a liquid explosion everywhere and the little man, being a very resourceful tot, had decided that he needed to add a few earthy tones to his artwork!
    Thank goodness we could just put him straight into the shower . . . though the highchair has never been the same!

  11. It was my first time using velcro and i was busy with my 2 other children.
    I had come back to the baby and he got a piece of velcro attached to his blanket then rolled over about 4 times and there was no nappy on him.

    He had also had done a poo and it was everywhere.

    Lauren Johnston

  12. Once upon a time there was a little girl named Freya. One day, when she was about six and a half months old, Freya and her family went to a friends house for dinner. Freya was new to the business of solids and she had a grand old time tucking into her first lasagne. A right mess was made and Freya was covered from head to toe.
    After dinner, Freya got to have a bath with her sister and their friend. Needless to say, the bath was a gorgeous shade of brown after three messy kids!
    Freya's daddy hadn't quite gotten the hang of Modern Cloth nappys, but while her mummy chatted with friends, he tried his best and very happily presented Freya, clean, nappied and dressed to mummy.
    An hour or so passed, the smell hit them all first. The tell tale sign that the inevitable had happened. What had gone in had indeed come out.
    Freya's mummy smiled sweetly at her daddy hoping he'd take the hint and change the soiled nappy. He conceeded.
    All was well until Freya's mummy and her friend heard a squeal and a profanity yelled from the nearby room. Running in, they discovered Freya happily gurgling and giggling away... Kicking her legs into the most disgusting concoction known to man. And the nappy was still on!
    It seems, even with the best intentions, Freya's daddy had had what we like to call a "nappy fail", either that or mysteriously Freya had been talented enough to do her business on the OUTSIDE of her nappy.
    Freya's daddy was going pale and holding his stomach while her mummy and their friend howled with laughter.
    Freya happily gurgled through a shower (fully dressed and layers taken off as they were cleaned) and then her mummy put on a nice clean nappy (with daddy watching!) and Freya had a lovely warm feed and drifted happily to sleep, none the wiser to the damage she'd caused to her daddy who still wont change a post-lasagne nappy.
    With many months of nappies ahead of them, I'm sure there will be many more stories to tell as they all live happily ever after... :P

    Sabrina Johnson, :)

  13. My daughter's worst poo catastrophe happened when she was about 4 months old. She was in a disposables because we didn't start cloth until she was 6 months. I was holding her while talking to a group leader at the end of an ABA meeting. She pooed with such force that it shot out of the leg of her nappy almost instantly, running onto my top, my jeans, and onto the carpet... leaving a suspicious yellow stain even after cleaning it up.

    Oh, and one day when we picked her up from daycare, they told us she had set a record for the messiest poo, it went from halfway up her back right down to her socks... a proud moment

    Helen Jones

  14. A Very Shitty Day

    It all started one morning when my partner had to work and i was left alone with my 2year old daughter and 6month old son. Both my children wear and always have worn modern cloth nappies and a few weeks before my incident i decided to try out these much more affordable nappies for $10 a mcn.

    So i woke up started my morning duties and my two year old started running over to me yelling "poo poo yucky poo" so i looked at her and she had poo all down her legs up her backside and over her hands in her fingernails. The only thing i could do is put her in the bath, when taking her nappy off, what was left of the chunk just fell onto the floor, scrubbed her fingers and body, when i dressed her i looked in her room and to my disgrace she had poo all over her bed and carpet and toys, i didnt know where to start, i cleaned most of it unsure if i had missed any and then i hit the showers as i was meeting friends for lunch.

    After my shower i heard my son in his room, i thought since he was happy id do my makeup and hair , after i had done everything i thought to myself "gee he has gone quiet".

    I went into my sons room to check on him and there he is with no pants or nappy on, face looked like he had been eating chocolate, he had it in his fingernails, arms, face, even his teeth, he rubbed his poo over the wall and all on his cot and as i stood there wondering, how i was going to do this and where do i start i take another look at my son and there he is moaning as he eats chunks of his own poo.

    Quickly i picked him up chucked him in the shower and washed him all over and brushed his 2 little toothy pegs. as i stood back to take a deep breath just before i took him out i wiped the hair off my face and looked in the mirror and to my unfortunate efforts i noticed i had wiped poo on my face.

    After i dressed him i put him down so i could start to clean the walls and cot and when i turned around he was gone, i went to find him and found him in my daughters room and to my shock my daughter had done another poo and easily took her nappy off and sat on her bed and watched her brother EAT her poo from her nappy. once again both went into the shower and i scrubbed them both. cleaned what was in her room, hosed the nappy and headed out on my lunch date with the kids and i was so embarressed when one of the ladies in the playgroup at lunch said "i think you have some food or something on your arm"...nope not food, i was too busy cleaning and scrubbing the kids i forgot to check myself to make sure no poo got on me! last time i ever used velcro on my babies, one bad day and that was the end of it.

    Kimberley Clarke

  15. My worst nappy catastrophe was when madam was a precious 3 months old. She just had a breastfeed and was playing in my lap as I was kicking back with my legs up on the lounge. The house was all shut up, windows and doors closed as hubby was out mowing the lawn and making one hell of a racket. Madam and I were just enjoying some quiet playtime until I had a little itch on my face which I proceeded to stratch noticing I had some oopsy poopsy on my hand....and now face. I didn't even realise she has relieved herself, let alone enough to cause a leakage. I look down into my lap to discover not only had her nappy leaked but there was now a nice big pool of running poop in my lap. I didn't want to stand up as I knew the little pool of poop in my lap would start trickling onto the lounge and down my legs. I heard the mower stop, I was thinking great, hubby will save me. But he did not return, so I started calling for him. My calls of help went unanswered as hubby couldn't hear through the closed windows, or so I assume! So I took off my shirt and used it to mop up the poop. I then headed towards the bathroom, babe in arms, started running the bath and proceeded to strip the baby off while trying to avoid 'poop in mouth'. So then ofcourse madam wees all over me when I am running her bath. I whisk her into the bath and then hear hub stumbling through the back door "Did you want something honey?"!

    Sara Lawrence

  16. Sometime over 1 year ago, when my eldest daughter was 1, My husband and I decided to go out to lunch to celebrate our Anniversary. This was the first time since she was born that we had managed to do this, just the two of us, so we were quite excited. It just happened that my parents we visiting for a couple of days and they had agreed to look after her for the couple of hours we were out.

    After a delicious and somewhat quiet lunch, we found ourselves returning home well before the anticipated 2 hours to find things seemingly just as we had left them. Unbeknown to us, in the 1 hour that we had been gone - Disaster had struck!

    We had left the house with Milla asleep in her cot. After a long period of silence, My Father decided to pop his head in to check things we okay. He took one look, then calmly walked into the kitchen and told my Mum that she should 'take a look'.

    Well.... Not only had little miss managed to take her nappy off, but poo was smeared absolutely everywhere! The cot, the walls, her hands..... even her FACE! Eww! Apparently they sprung into action, with my Dad bathing the little poo monster and my Mum cleaning the sheets/cot/walls.

    We returned home just in time to a lovely clean room with a just hint of lemon fragrance masking the earlier escapades. Of course, we now only use nappies with snaps :P

    Hayley Feighan

  17. I have two poo-tastrophes that come to mind. First was when Tyler was 6 weeks old. We were staying at my grandmother's house - my gran is UBER-tidy... Everything in it's place and a place for everything, vacuums twice daily, lovely furnishings... At 2am Tyler woke up and needed changed. Expecting to just quickly change and be done with it, I was definitely not expecting what happened.

    As soon as I unfolded his nappy, he did a little fart. "Phew!" I thought, and removed the nappy from under him. Suddenly, he pulled his legs up to his chest and sprayed a flood of poo 4 feet across the room - landing ALL over granny's beautiful broderie englaise bedspread - and, even worse, her lovely clean CREAM CARPET!! So my discrete little nappy change turned into bashing around in cupboards trying to find something to clean up the mess. I was mortified.

    Second of all was when Tyler first got into that "I can remove my own nappy" phase. He was about 10 months old. I woke up one morning at 9am... thought "Hmmm... that's strange. Tyler is normally up and about by 7:30... and definitely not usually THIS quiet..." I could smell it before I could see it. There was my son, and his V-tech puppy "Scout" - both coated in poo. Tyler and Scout both looked like band-members from "KISS"... Their faces caked in poo smears. There wasn't a single bit on the cot, on the floor or on his bedding, it was ALL on their faces. I was also pregnant at the time and it was so gross I had to throw up, the only thing I could grab in time was the gro-bag he'd escaped from. So he's dancing around with a face covered in poo, I'm heaving into a gro-bag, and then *knock knock knock* - my LAND AGENT shows up at the door for a routine house inspection I'd forgotten about... Talk about being red in the face (or brown, in Tyler's case!) :)

    Emma 'Chelsea Dagger' Boyce

  18. When we finally were able to bring Ollie home my dog was obsessed with nappy changes. It wasn't an issue at first as she would always let me know when he needed to be changed.

    After 2 or so weeks battling with the dog at nappy changes, unknown to myself my dog was about to learn her lesson. I had bub up on the change mat dog inbetween baby and myself. When Ollie did one of those exclusively breastfed squirting poonami's all over the poor dogs face eventually dripping down. I must say I was quite lucky my dog was in the way as she took the entire force of it. When I finally stopped laughing the poor dog had a bath, to this day she is still in there letting me know when a nappy change is needed ... She does sit back a little further now :P

    Cassie Dose

  19. This Nappy Catastrophe was from the days of toilet training my now 4.5 y/o son.

    It wasn't going so well, and we were kind of frustrated, because he knew when he was going to poo, because he'd always hide in the same spot. Anyway, one afternoon I was breastfeeding my newborn, and I hear him go off to the toilet.

    As we were still in the process of toilet training, I was a bit nervous, but stuck feeding.

    I heard him say "uh-oh" - which immediately had me concerned!

    So I stand up (baby still attached) and wander into the toilet. What a sight I saw!!!

    Turns out, he did a poo in his nappy and felt guilty, so he went to the toilet. The end result was poo on the floor, poo on the step, poo on the toilet, and because he'd stepped on it and smeared it in, poo on the bottom of his shoe.

    So there I was, feeding a newborn, toddler and toilet covered in poo and ever so slightly losing my cool... good times, good times! :-/

    Bridget Armstrong

  20. My story doesn't really involve a poosplosion or a poo mishap as such.

    My son LOVES sultanas. He'd eat nothing else if I let him. Problem is, when they exit out the other end, they're pretty much full formed and look just the same as they did when they were eaten.

    He's also at the age where he hates being laid down to be changed, so I tend to remove his nappy and clean him up whilst he's standing.

    A few weeks ago, I took off his dirty nappy and a few sultanas rolled out of it, looking a little worse for wear, but still fully formed. I wiped off as much of the mess from his bum with the nappy and then stood up to locate a wipe to clean up the escaped sultanas, looking down at him just in time to catch him scoop them up and eat them!!!!

    We like to recycle but not to those lengths.

    Cathryn Welch

  21. Ours happened when DD was about 15 months old. I had put her down for her nap, i could hear her playing for about 30mins. When i was sure she was asleep i went in to check on her and cover her up. She had some how managed to get one side of her nappy undone. There was poo everywhere. All over her legs, her back, the doona, the sheets, the wall, the cot. so so gross and then i had to wake her up to clean her off and the room. then deal with a grumpy baby for the rest of the day.

  22. When my daughter was about 3 weeks old, it was time to celebrate Christmas. So Christmas Eve was held at my place and my mother, father, brother and sister all came too, so we could all have Lexi's first Christmas together.

    We had everything set up outside, because I live in North Queensland, it was much cooler to be outside than in. That afternoon, Lexi had slept for a little while, and when she woke up she wanted to feed. That day she wanted to be on for an hour and half. Constant sucking for an hour and a half. When she was full and looking more like a beach ball than a baby, I took her outside to be with nanny and poppy. For about 15 minutes she was letting off these eruptions, so loud that they'd knock your socks off. The smell was horrid! So, I thought 'better change her bum'. I put her on the change table, which was too set up outside, bent down to pick up a nappy from the tray and when I stood back up; my life flashed before my eyes. Liquid poo was squirting out of her! I copped the full blast in my face and it was all through my hair. It sprinkled over nanny and poppy and landed in aunty and uncles drinks. My OH was standing off to the side and he luckily missed any of the blast, but upon seeing poo everywhere, he threw up all over my sister's back. It was a mean viscous circle. Needless to say it'll be a Christmas we will never forget!

    Tonie Cooper

  23. MCN no quick changes all had to be folded and dried on the washing line just right otherwise they would lose their shape then wouldnt fold I have two that come to mind and both are from my 1st born way back in 2000....

    you have to remember it was Hardcore cloth nappies back then... Terry FLATS... no cute right...

    To begin... I was 20 and just had my 1st baby, I was in LOVE but I lived in another state from my family so was on my OWN... it was all new as it is with everyone..

    My little man was looking more than a little yellow just after he was born so after 3 days they told me he would have to go under blue lights, I was very scared ( no need to be )... Anyway the nurse told me he had to be striped of to go under said lights, and to give him a feed before he went in... then left me too it...

    So as you can imagin been a neive 20 yr old I did just that... I took off all his clothes and nappy too, and started to BF him...

    I will give you 3 guesses what happend that right like most newborns what goes in one end must come out the other... I was covered in newborn poop, the nurse walk in and straight out again ( to have a giggle ) then came back in to help me clean up...

    To make it worse later on that night while I was in the room to BF my baby it was shift change they did all the normal stuff then I heard the nurse recounting my poo misshapp they all gave out a huge cackle... then I had to walk out bright red back to my room...

    the 2nd Nappy misshap was once again with my 1st born...

    I used to keep a bucket near his change table so that it would make things easier...

    Things were easier, easier for him to go though...

    Thats right, I put him down for his nap... after a few hrs I thought I would peer though the window to see if he was awake...

    He was awake alright, he had climbed out of his cot ( about 14mths at the time ) and had gotten into his bucket... not only was he sitting there playing in his dirty nappies, he had painted the wall, window ,mirror and HIMSELF its was everywhere, ears, hair, mouth he was covered in the stuff... I just stood there not know what to do... Not wanting to clean it up, not knowing where to start...

    Natalia 'Tali' Davis

  24. My little girl was a serial projectile pooper when she was young. It started when she was still in hospital - she covered 2 of the midwives and she got me lots of times. It seemed like every time I changed her nappy in the first 3 months she would shoot poo everywhere, even if she had just filled her nappy she saved some to shair with me!

    But I think her best shot was when she got the dog who was just sitting on the floor minding its own business over 3ft away. The dog thought it was mana from heaven, like fast food falling from the sky! He was so quick at cleaning it up that by the time I had finished changing Maitreya's nappy I couldn't find any, just a bit on my shirt that the dog was trying to climb up me to get.

    Our dog hadn't been interested in this new member of the pack but after he discovered what she could make in her nappy he followed her around everywhere (he still does, shes 22months now and they are the best of friends) As soon as she pooed he would sit and whine, like he was saying "can I have some pleasssssseeee" He was the best nappy change alarm EVER!

    <3 Kush Bourke

    ps - I've been loving reading all the poo disaster stories - My brother once commented that it was like me and my sister could talk about our baby's poo all day! I think every mum I've ever met can too :)

  25. our gorgeous baby girl arrived at 31.5 weeks so had to spend some time in NICU & then after about a week in NICU was transferred to the special care nursery. it was quite tricky learning to change her nappies thru a hole on the side of her isolette & i will never forget this one nappy change mummy just wasn't quick enough to get her wiped & new dry nappy on before she decided to poo which covered her bedding, dolly at the end of her isolette & decorated parts of the end also, was definately a job getting her out with all her tubes to remake her bedding & thoroughly clean her isolette & take dolly home for a nice wash!

    another time she decided to get mummy was not long after she was in an open cot in the special care nursery, i was changing her outfit & doing her cares when realised i didn't have some wet cotton balls so stupidly did a quick dash to the sink & just as i was lifting her to put her dry nappy underneath she decided to let loose which then covered her nice fresh bedding, clean clothes, end of her cot & best of all down the front of mummy & even to the extent of hitting my feet which i was wearing thongs at the time wasn't a pretty picture!! i can cheerfully say that i have learnt my lesson & thankfully never had to clean up such a mess or as the nurses used to call it a number three hehe

    sarah osland

  26. Well...
    when DS was about 6 months old he was having a nap in his cot or at least i thought he was.....
    WEnt in to check on him as it had been extremley quiet for a long time.
    I found him nappy less with poo smeared on every surface of his cot, on his teddy bear, he had eaten it :O it was all caked up in his teeth and squished in his hands and he had thrown nuggets of poo around the bedroom i didnt know what to do lmao getting it out of his teeth would have to be the worst thing i have ever done!!

  27. When you first posted this I didn't really think I had a poo story worthy...and then last week....

    It’s a work day so of course that entails quite a bit of rushing around to get dog, baby & Mum sorted and out the door. I’m usually running late and so was extremely pleased with myself that I was about to head out the door on time for once, bub had already done his morning poo, everything packed & in the car, everyone dressed.....Just as I was about to pick him up and head out the door I smelt that smell we all know too well. What? Another one this morning? Hmm, ok, let’s do a quick change and we’ll still be on time. Pop him on the change mat, pants off, nappy unsnapped, oops, forgot to grab a new one. Jump up and dash over to grab a clean nappy. Dash back to bub who has managed to get his nappy off with the poo landing nicely in the centre of his chest. As I’m trying to grab the dirty nappy and a wipe to catch said poo he manages to grab it and squish it in his pudgy little hands which he then stares at with fascination. I grab one hand and start to clean it off, meanwhile the other one heads for his hair, before grabbing the sleeve of my white top...20 minutes, a shower and fresh clothes for us both and we were finally out the door.

    Kristen Short on FB

  28. Our poo disaster happened a few weeks ago when we first moved to Australia.
    We were at Bondi Westfield shopping for a new tv and had been walking around the shops for a couple of hours comparing models and prices. During that time madam had done her 'red, grunting poo face' but I had had a quick sniff, and she was still happy so it seemed like she hadn't achieved anything.
    We continued shopping and did some groceries then headed back to the car just as the mall was about to close.
    We got to the car and my partner unstrapped her and went to pick her, as he did he let out a disgusted yell! Apparently she had pooed, and not just any poo, it was watery, sludgy green poo (she had recently had a virus) and had seeped out the sides, top and back of her itti tutto, soaked through her jeggings, and formed a little puddle on the seat of her pram. Not just any pram I might add, our friends fairly new and expensive bugaboo that we have on loan.

    He pretty much threw her at me so I lay her down on the back seat of the car, on his jacket for a bit of padding. With him stressing and yelling that we only had a few minutes to get out (we had alreadsy paid for our parking)I stripped off all her clothes which her promptly binned as they were dripping wet and were bound to stink the car out on our 40min car ride home. Poor darling girl had to sit in her carseat in just a nappy with my jacket over her as we had already used the spare change of clothes for an earlier poo explosion.

    My partner went to put his jacket on before getting in the car, only to discovere that it too was smeared with poo. 5 weeks and several washes later he still can't bring himself to wear it!

    Lesson of the year, keep multiple clothing changes and an old blanket handy to cover the carseat!!!

  29. When you are new to the parenting scene and you’re in the haziness of "cloud 9" because your new baby is soooo adorable (or maybe its lack of sleep?), the new parent can often become complacent. And that’s exactly what I did!! Time and time again, everyone kept saying "Shay they do not finish their poo in one BIG grunt!!" and did you think I was going to listen - pfffttt - I was a parent of a whole 2 weeks, I knew exactly what I was doing! I knew how to change a pooey nappy - heck after changing that hideous black tar in the hospital, what could be worse?! LOL...
    so the grunt came.. pursed lips, red face hhhmmmmmm and i raced over!! "time to change your nappy" i cooed to my little 2week old. "ahhh Shay I'd wait if I was you" said my mate, a dad of two – but all good mums know that dad’s really don’t know a thing about changing a nappy right? But it was too late, the nappy was already off and by the time I could say "holy crapola" my bub gave one almight second sneaky grunt and out shot the most outrageous constant yellow stream - in hose formation out of his bum!!! The BF poo’s were always sooo watery and this was the best of them! All i can say is thank goodness for our purchase of the hospital trolley which is our downstairs change table as it hit the side with one all mighty bang (kind of like the explosion of a poor bug on your windscreen - and it slowly slid down to a big blob under the foam mattress at the bottom of the plastic basket..... eeewwww my mate and I were in hysterics (Me because firstly I didn’t think anything from a baby as sweet as mine was even possible and He was cracking up because the near miss to my face and his warning was just to good to let it slide!!)
    And as disgusting as it is i just had to take a piccie just to show hubby what nearly hit me in the face!! So prior to this, two weeks ago I knew nothing about babies, clearly i still didn't!, But you can bet your bottom dollar knew about poo timings after that!! nothing grosses me out anymore!!!

    Shay Thetford


    Worst poo incident .. Daddy was carring LO around Target and told me he was wet .. well he was more than wet , Daddy had yellow runny poop covering his shirt .. He was so embarrassed to have to buy a new shirt to go change into ..

  31. The first stage of the competition is now closed , I will put together a blog over the next 24 hours with the second stage , with the announcements of the ten lucky contestants selected by All these stories are fantastic , and its comforting to know we all have our own little Salvador Dali !

    - Jerry Red x